What I’m NOT Thankful: Hallway Edition

With Thanksgiving season upon us, we are all asked to reflect on the good things in life; family, friends and all that jazz. But you know what? I’m thankful for the bad things. They provide perspective, so here’s a tribute to the darker side of life- in the hallway.

 People walking on the wrong side of the hallway. You’re in a hurry to your next class; you have to rush to your locker, stop by the bathroom and speed on over to Intro to Business. You take the same path you do every other day, and you aren’t exactly paying attention until all of a sudden, hello, there’s someone walking straight towards you. You both halt, trying to figure out who should go where, and before you know it you’ve lost about a minute of passing time. And when you have five minutes to get to class, that is quite a chunk of time you’ve just wasted. Seriously guys, the rules of the hallway are like driving; walk on the right side and look both ways when turning. A bonus word of caution- don’t walk right up next to the wall when you’re about to turn. Keep a little bit of space there, because chances are someone else is walking right there too. WHAM!

 Large Groups. Okay, groups of two or three are manageable. But when you and your three other friends decide to link arms and walk in a straight line down the hallway, you start to take up a ridiculous amount of room. People would like to be able to pass you as if they were driving on a divided highway- without going into oncoming traffic. And yes, people will want to pass you because chances are you will be walking slower than my old and very obese beagle. So please, do your fellow classmates a favor, and subdivide your large groups. Try walking in clumps, rather than lines.

 Public Displays of Affection (PDA). Let me just start out by saying, yes, I know I am a prude. I also know it is ridiculous that even hand holding can sometimes make me sick. But the gag reflex that kicks in whenever I see a couple together in the hallway, is not the only reason I am not thankful for PDA. Sometimes it’s just inconvenient, such as when a couple decides that the middle of the hallway is the perfect place to hug for the rest of eternity. Hey, I’m walkin’ here!

 At the CVSPA conference held November 3, I and other Paw Print staffers got the chance to discuss PDA with writers from other high school newspapers. One reporter believed that excessive PDA brings out the insecurities of couples and passers-by. On one hand, you possibly have the couple’s need to prove their love. Maybe their relationship is not going smoothly, and they feel the need to overcompensate for their private problems in public. On the other hand, you could have a lonely passer-by. Maybe they had just been through a bad break-up, or maybe they just feel alone.

 Crowded lockers. We all have had the experience of shoving our way through people to get to our lockers. It’s not anyone’s fault, it’s just the way it is, and sadly it is not reasonable for the school to spend money to space out our lockers. But there are ways to reduce the amount of time you spend fighting for room at your locker. Try to cut back on your trips to your locker. if you have a class, such as Keyboarding or Band, that doesn’t require more than a pencil, bring your books for your next class with you. If you have classes that are right next to each other, you might as well bring your books for both classes with you. You won’t be carrying them that far, and those baskets underneath your desks are there for a reason.

 The Green Hallway after first block. What is it about the Green Hallway that makes it so much more crowded than any of the others? Even when there aren’t cookies being sold, it is so crowded. Anyway, if you don’t wish to enjoy the deliciousness that is the Otis Spunkmeyer cookie, I suggest avoiding this hallway in between first and second block.